Olympic Talk #2 Maturity or Immaturity -- Which Do You Choose?

Olympic Talk 10/29/26

(These are eight-minute speeches that, were I still delivering talks at the Olympic Club on Thursdays, I might have given. My public speaking skills are deteriorating: my voice is reedy and flat, my gestures wooden and unconvincing. But I still like scripting speeches and have things to say. So, in my dotage . . . call me Speechwriter.)

Maturity or Immaturity: Which Do You Choose?

Last night Ann and I went to the Opera to watch Salome have John the Baptist beheaded. And then, to give his head a big, wet kiss. It was a Richard Strauss Opera – all recitative and in German, to boot; nothing lyric about it. You don't go home from a Strauss opera whistling a melody.

The Oscar Wilde version of the tale from the Books of Mark and Matthew, is dramatic: a pubescent teen teetering on the brink of adulthood, pursued by lecherous Herod the Great, her stepfather; obsessed with John whom Herod has incarcerated, wielding her royal position and new found sexual power to wreak vengeance on John for . . . for not looking at her. She hates John; she is obsessed with John; she loves John. She demands his head on a silver platter and King Herod complies. A story of inability to control impulses, of teen-age ego-centrism, of immaturity encased in a mature body.

How do we judge maturity? When we say someone is immature on what do we base our judgement? Physical traits of course; does she or he show body development that makes us think “infant” or “child” or “teen” or “adult?” Salome (of the seven veils) is fully adult on this standard.

But on judgement and behavior? She is clearly immature, unable to reason, unable to control her impulses, acting out utter, unreasoned vengeance for an imagined slight.

What behaviors are generally seen as immature? Tantrums, of course. One of my grandsons is a clinical family therapist. He, thinks I am overly self-controlled and recommends that I have a tantrum once in a while:  lay on the floor, kick my feet, hold my breath until I turn blue, scream. In my decrepit state, by the time I struggled to get down onto the floor the need would have long passed, And scream? Me? These ancient vocal cords would twang in two.

But if I did throw a tantrum, would you not say "OMG, how immature?" Same with losing one's temper. What would you say if were to become so outraged here at the Olympic Club that I threw a ketchup-laden hamburger against dining room wall? How mature would that be?

Is seeking revenge for disappointment, for a minor slight, is hounding a person, mounting a vendetta against a group, or trashing a whole nation with vulgarity, is that rational behavior of a mature man or more than a bit irrational?

Is compulsively telling fibs the behavior of a mature person or a sign of irrational immaturity?

The ability to postpone gratification, to act appropriately is used in tests of maturity. A rational, mature person can reason, can choose to wait for a better time or for a more appropriate way, or to accept frustration while the immature man-child may not be able to control his  impulses. He wants it now! He wants his own. He wants it all and doesn't care how it looks to others. Why is it among the first words a toddler learns is "mine"? "Mine, mine!"

The immature often lack self-confidence. They often plaster over their lack of confidence with tough talk, violent and vulgar language, bullying, and – of course – getting others to echo their fibs and tough talk.

Age can impact mature judgement and action. In Cincinnati, I worked a few years for a family of brothers who were headed by the eldest, in his late-seventies. As we encountered problems, he would became increasingly erratic, child-like, immaturely insisting his was the only way. And yes, he threw tantrums – and even, once an ashtray, at one of his brothers. When admonished: "Albert, don't get angry" he responded gravely, pounding the conference table on every word, "I am not angry; I am merely, … being …  emphatic."

~~~~~

So, to the question: maturity or immaturity – which do you favor? In whom, the man or the man-child, the mature or the immature, do you place your trust? Which would you choose as investment manager? Which would you choose as God father of your child? Whom do you choose as leader? Whom do you choose to follow?