Thursday, March 2, 2017

Has political polarization affected your relationships with others?

Last week, I asked my luncheon club companions that question.  To a man, the sixteen all said yes, to one degree or another.  Most of the responses described troubling effects; self-conscious constraint, avoidance of contact or subjects, guardedness in conversation.   A couple found positives in greater depth of communications and sharing of concerns.

After addressing the retirement community of which I am a Trustee, I got similar feedback: the heated political polarization is on the whole straining the sense of community, its commitment to being a gracious space in which assertive listening is to be practiced and the stranger is to be welcomed.

What’s is political polarization? Fundamentally, it’s one person judging another as “wrong”.  Is that what we are becoming – a nation of judgmental prigs certain that our views, values and understanding are superior to those of others? 

The Founding Fathers warned us of the poisons of “faction” yet it took only eight years to morph into factional parties.  Apparently clan, faction, party, sect – call it what you will -- are hard-wired into us sapiens.  But can’t we act in spite of?  Do we really need inferiors to look down upon; do whites really need people of color over which to feel superior; or Pennsylvanians, their New Jersey neighbors to look down upon; or Christians, their Jews or Muslims; or Democrats their Republicans and Republicans their Democrats?  Can’t we act in spite of?  Yes – and we must.
Polarization justifies, indeed, celebrates winning.  When we indulge our certainty of superiority, when we judge the other wrong, when we resist empathizing with their views and concerns, we may win but in doing so, widen the gulf of misunderstanding and harden the others’ rationale of rejection and desire for revenge. 

Our President (with whom I disagree on most everything) said last night that we can solve problems and improve our commonwealth only by finding common cause and coming together.  Couldn’t agree more – both in national and personal spheres.  Mind-numbing resistance to the other must be overcome by welcoming and listening for common concerns and values that can bind us together.  I’m not talking about mere tolerance; I’m talking about active engagement. 

On the national scene, leaders like Sanders and commentators like Krugman and Blow are inciting resistance and outrage, citing the example of Tea Party intransigence and McConnell’s treatment of Obama.  There is much to be outraged about, many policy proposals to resist, and McConnell is only a fool's role model.  But mindless outrage and blind resistance only prolong polarization.  It may bring a win, but winners and losers don’t count anymore; only collaborators can make progress in our democracy.  


And the same goes in the personal sphere: avoidance, being on guard, stereotyping and being judgmental are inhibitors of empathy and growth.  Friends and acquaintances are too precious to be sacrificed on a parochial political altar.

1 comment:

  1. Odds makers in Las Vegas were putting the odds 4 to 1 that President Trump would resign in six months. The news today about the Russia connection and the recurring suggestions about tax returns showing oligarch funding will turn up the heat. I don't relish the idea of a Pence presidency, at least he lives in a more real world than the President.
    Now as to your comment, I agree that polarization is negative if it keeps people from working to solve real problems, like the obstructionist posture of the past 8 years. However it can bring clarity to people who haven't been paying attention. That's a first step to getting engaged in the process and working to make positive change.

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